In the first two parts of this latest forgiveness series, Donna Meredith Dixon (see interview below) demonstrates how wives of porn/sex addicts are often pressured to forgive. This forgiveness can come from the church, her husband and even herself.
The reality is: forgiveness is a multi-step process that takes time and God’s help. The process includes disclosure/discovery (we can’t forgive what we are unaware of), feeling the pain, grieving the losses and making an initial decision to forgive, with God’s assistance.
My mother, the addictions counselor, often reminds the partners of addicts that forgiveness is for the sake of the one forgiving – not for the sake of the perpetrator. It frees us to live a full life that isn’t weighed down by bitterness and pain.
However, forgiveness is not only about us. In Beyond Betrayal, I write:
While I stated earlier that forgiveness is…